Life Lesson 3: It's Okay to Lose your Spark

It's okay to lose your spark. 

Can you genuinely say that you like the person you are? If so, what does this person look like? Are you kind? What are your life goals? What are you passionate about? How are the relationships in your life? How do you show up in your day-to-day? What about if you don’t like the person you are? Why is that so? What have you done recently that has affected this view about yourself? 

This is something I have been thinking about lately and although I hope you like who you are, why does contemporary society normalize liking who we are?  The way I see it is that if you always like who you are, you will never improve. Nothing in life is ever constant. Jobs, relationships, school, habits, passions, ideas, absolutely nothing. I have been a bit depressed lately trying to grasp this concept. Here at uni, I do not like the person I have become. I am smart, I have morals, I have passions, but something is missing. I am missing my spark.

I started feeling this way since the start of my second semester. I feel less motivated in my classes, I worry about the future, and I simply have no energy left to show up with my friends. It’s just exhausting. But you know what? Feeling this way is perfectly fine! You never have to show up 100% every day and I loathe the people who expect you to. At the end of the day, I am human, you are human, we are human. 

But what if I want to stop feeling like this? No outside pressures, just a pure desire to get my spark back. From personal experience, there is no other way to stop feeling like this except to allow yourself to feel like this. Sit and have a conversation with yourself. When did you feel yourself losing your spark? Was there any particular reason? Mine was losing my sense of belonging here at uni. While I fell in love with my classes for the semester, I fell out of love with some of my friendships. I know it is hard to admit, but sometimes the people you initially grow with are not always those you consistently grow with. With this came a bout of depression that I needed to navigate with myself. I felt it so necessary to find a group and fit in right away in the first semester that I seemed to lose myself in the process. I want to gain myself back, but for now, not being 100% is all I can do. And that’s okay.

Say it with me out loud; it is okay. 

I am keeping this very short and simple as I have no further thoughts at the moment. I am back to regularly posting and as always, I send my best.